IGCSE: I get completely screwed everyday.
Here we go again. Every day, I wake up to the pleasant thought that I need to do past papers. Now the only person helping me with the exams is me myself. I don’t know how much I should work. But I don’t wanna screw up my mental health for the 4th consecutive school year.
I just want to see some real improvement in my past paper drilling. However, when will I actually memorize what I got wrong?
It takes quite a while. However I don’t really know of any other good revision methods. The most is quizzing myself on topics I am weak at.
I get screwed everyday.
But getting screwed in the exam room is worse than getting screwed everyday.
So Here I Am, studying instead of eating lunch.
So Here I Am, panicking about my future instead of focusing on the present.
So Here I Am, doing lots of past papers instead of taking care of my life.
I no longer feel any happiness, just the sheer boredom of drilling exam papers makes my excitement go away instantly.
Exams start on April 25, in Easter break (what a waste), and don’t end until June 11th. What a long period of time to be flailing.
I’m numb and dead, unaware of my meaning in a world of depression.
All I know is that I get completely screwed everyday, and there is nothing I can really do other than to deal with it.
Suffer with it.
Making it screw up my life.
For the better. (?)
That I actually allow it to screw up my life.
It is the origin of Anxiety.
It is the origin of Stress.
It is the cause of Suffering.
It is the cause of Sadness.
Especially Biology, where I have to memorize a lot.
And Chemistry, where everything is confusing.
And Chinese, where every answer makes no sense.
That is how IGCSE exams screw up my life. And I want to screw Cambridge back. However, I don’t really know how!