Getting joy from others. It's illogical at first glance, but perhaps it can be a
motivator
that just isn't a societal norm.
Morally, as long as YOU are not the direct causer, and just having it in
your brain...
Monologues are a good way to sound "evil". However, NEVER be the direct causer! If this makes you feel more powerful, it may be a win from your subjective experience.
My desire for vengeance will persist to drive me towards having a
mighty might consistently, as the natural rivalry will continue to exist
until the end of the examination cycle.
The first cause is the examination system, set by the examination
board.
However, what also impacts my ability to do well is noisy classmates and
an inefficient and zero-sum examination school system. But I don’t care
for that; I want to do well despite that!
My power is to demonstrate my worth, and I want to prove that most
others are inferior to me in this game of brute-force memorization, as
their pitiful performances is my generation of joy. To them, dying in
the death of stress is a beautiful blooming of surprise for me. They are
drowning in desperate despair, while I see their failures as fuel for my
fury for a fortuneous future! As long as I exist, I can hyper-optimize
myself for this exact goal while others struggle futilely to move past
their inabilities. There is no need to be affectionate or helpful to my
competitors, for their crapiness or wasted time in compassion can be
capitalized in my own colosseum for power.
The only way I can possess superiority is by being above most other
candidates.
An intense Will for the elimination of my competition… will be my
motivation for a resolution to domination.